Monday, February 20, 2012


     I saw a pregnant woman and came home and cried for hours; I feel cheated. No one’s at fault, but I’m still angry. Disease took what I thought would one day carry my child. I’m incomplete, empty. I’ll never feel my child growing in me. I’ll never feel a little foot kicking or a little elbow reminding me that I’ll soon hold my own little angel in my arms. I'll never grow big with my baby. I'll never sit for hours and rub my belly and talk to my baby. All I can do is smile at each pregnant woman I see, or hold each little niece or nephew that’s placed in my arms.
     I've raised my nephew as my own. I love him so much and I tell him every chance I have. I know God's blessed me with him. I've loved all my nephews and nieces as my own. I've cherished and protected. I've smiled and laughed and then I’ve come home and my tears have soaked my pillow until it feels like my heart will break. I’m 50 years old now; why doesn't it stop hurting? Why haven't the tears stopped? It hurts, it hurts, Father, it hurts…

Sunday, February 5, 2012

An Arellano Blessing


A soft throaty growl. A small wild animal perhaps? A giggle, a coo, then the softest skin that God ever created. A little back rubbed, a burp and a smile. Eyes closing softly in dreamless sleep. Resting my cheek against soft downy hair, I kiss the sweet wrinkle between her eyes. Landynn, an Arellano blessing.

Saturday, February 4, 2012


Swish Swish

I sat on my porch watching two squirrels play and jump for several minutes. I laughed and cheered them on, overjoyed by their antics. They hid for a bit when the birds flew down for the bread I’d put out earlier, then jumped out noisily to join the birds at play. My backyard; nature’s playground.


I laughed, sobbed, hiccupped, then threw up. My legs were gone! I hated this disease. Shouldn’t have walked around barefoot, but who would have known that what was merely bothersome for others, could almost kill someone else. 
Ok enough! Time to pull myself up by my bootstraps and move on. Diabetes will not defeat me!

Written for Bluebell Books Short Story Slam Week 20. Stop by and and read some really awesome writers:

Soul Song

     I waited for hours in our special place. I knew he wouldn’t show up. My Paul was gone; our bed empty and cold. He’d never again wake me with a kiss and a whisper, “Wake up Sleeping Beauty. Let’s make some music.” I rubbed my belly and hummed to the song our music had created.

This was written for Bluebell Books: Short Story Slam Week 20. Thanks for the opportunity!:

Friday, February 3, 2012

Garden of Laughs

                                         Royal Botanical Gardens, Kew

     I walked along the path looking at all the beautiful red, purple and pink flowers. It was beautiful here; so serene and I felt like I was in my own little world. I took a deep, deep breath and thought about the last time I’d walked this path with my sister a couple of years ago.
     I started laughing my head off; one of those deep belly-rolling laughs that once started you can’t seem to stop. People were giving me a look that said, ‘Steer clear of that weirdo.’
     My sister was visiting from out of town and because I loved this place so much I brought her here. I forgot how clumsy she was and started off on a brisk walk expecting her to keep up with me. I’d been walking for maybe half an hour and realized that I couldn’t hear her voice anymore. I looked back and low and behold she wasn’t there.
     I ran back to the entrance and when she wasn’t there waiting for me, I followed the same paths as before, calling out her name as I went, “Mel! Mel, where are you?”
     Finally towards the center of the park I heard giggling, hiccupping and groaning. The flowerbeds towards the center were raised a bit and I finally found a way to look over the edge and there on her back in a puddle of mud lay Mel.
     “Oh for goodness sakes! What happened? Why didn’t you call out to me when you first fell Melly!!” I put my hand out to help her up and she didn’t give me the chance to pull, she pulled instead. With a shriek, I went face down into the mud and just lay there for a bit, blowing mud bubbles. I finally managed to back up on my knees and sit, spitting out mud the whole time. I tried to glare at Mel, but it’s kind of hard to glare when your glasses are full of mud and other stuff. Pulling my glasses off I tried to wipe them off with muddy fingers, which didn’t really help a heck of a whole bunch!
     “Melly, how’d you end up in here?”
     “I bent over to smell the flowers and some little kids were running past and bumped into me. I couldn’t move out of the way and fell into and over the flowerbeds. I’m sorry!”
     “Oh no! Please don’t tell me you damaged the flowers!” I shrieked again.
     “Don’t worry, I made sure I fell really softly, okay?” she said sarcastically.
     We looked at each other and started laughing like hyenas. We’re both asthmatic, so you can imagine how we sounded. I knew we had to find a way out without climbing over the flowers and after looking around at the beautiful pop of color of the flowers I noticed that there were tools back here. I knew the garden’s caretakers didn’t climb over the flowerbeds to get to their tools and after looking a few minutes I found a small door.
     Helping my sister up we walked out with our heads held high or tried to anyway. We finished our walk, holding on to each other and laughing the entire time. On the drive home she looked at me and said, “That was a beautiful garden. Let’s do that again sometime.” She was so serious, but it was kind of hard to take her seriously when her hair was dried and sticking up with mud and twigs all over it. We started laughing again and didn’t stop until we got home.
     I looked at my watch; I had an hour to kill before I had to pick Mel up at the bus station. I thought I better enjoy the garden before I brought her back here tomorrow. With a little snort, I started laughing again.
This story was written for Imaginary Garden with Real Toads picture prompt. Thanks for the opportunity!

Also shared with the Purple Treehouse At New York TimeS(quare) for Funny Bunny Week 9:
Thanks for the invite and opportunity to share. :-)